cheating

309: Lead, Follow, or Get Out of the Way

This is the goddamned worst episode title ever. Tina is “straight” “again”, Shane and Carmen continue to be terrible together, and the girls throw a benefit to raise money for Max’s top surgery.

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307: Lone Star

Absolutely nothing happens, thanks Ilene. Dana still has cancer and is also a bitch. Also, shoutout to Alice for putting her in her place.

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306: Lifesize

Dana’s cancer is WAY WORSE than they could have ever imagined!! Everyone is super bad at being in a relationship. Jenny gets a book published.

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305: Lifeline

Dana is a wimp, Max is realizing he’s definitely a man, and Bette and Tina have literally the worst relationship of all time. Not too much happens, but we still have some stuff to talk about, so that’s something!! Also we’re 1.5 lesbians again.

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209: Late, Later, Latent

Jenny finally shows some personality! Kit gets stood up. Bette and Tina can’t make heads or tails of their relationship. Alice and Dana really just love talking about strapons.

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207: Luminous

Even more unnecessarily gooey scenes with Helena and Tina/Alice and Dana. Carmen basically tells Jenny she doesn’t even like her, but… they don’t break up. Thanks Ilene, for another bad, weird episode.

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206: Lagrimas de Oro

Alice encourages/forces Dana to break up with Tonya, only to find out that Tonya is now having an affair with her! Tina moves into the apartment Bette is buying for her. Tina has sex with Helena in a pool and it’s super gross.

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205: Labrynth

Everyone FINALLY knows that Tina is pregnant! Thank god! Tina gets a large grant from Helena Peabody, Dana and Tonya have a bachelorette party, and Bette and Tina think they might get back together until Helena (the hottest one of all) shows up and Tina forgets all about stupid Bette.

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113: Locked Up

There is a riot outside of Bette’s museum that lands her and Candace (and some other lesbians) in the LA slammer! Marina is the WORST and actively pursues a girl Jenny is dating. Jenny meets an NJB even though her sexual orientation is “manatees”. Hannah Moskowitz wrote The Shape of Water!